Illness and the Little Things

Well now that the people who needed to know personally from me know the big miracle unfolding, I can tell the rest of the world.  This coming Monday morning I will be having an outpatient surgery on my left rib.  The 7th rib to be exact.  Here I will try to answer any questions that people might ask about it.  I am still in shock but feel very humbled by how everything went down. As we all know, last Wednesday I posted my pity post of frustration.  Nothing was going right at that point.  I just needed a day or two to vent, be sad, frustrated, and what not.  That evening I had gotten the CT Scan done.  I was told that the surgeon would call me with the results the next day. Let me remind you that I was fully prepared for the following:  The scan would not show anything, the next step would be to kill the nerve around the rib, that experiment would fail, and I would be left with nothing.  Even during the meeting with the surgeon, he said...

GJFKLSJOFKOVNKFMGIOBJFVNDFWOQPDPLDKVJKN VKJVNDKJVNSKDLCMDLXKCM! That is how I am feeling right now.  It is how I have been feeling since my last post.  Today just happened to be the breaking point for me.  It has been feeling like all my efforts to get proper paperwork, doctors appointments, etc. have failed.  Today I felt like any hope I had to keep fighting was lost. Why try anymore?  Is this really how I am going to be the rest of my life?  If so, then why I am I fighting so hard to get results that will never come? I had been filing for Medicaid with the state since I am not working.  That itself is a very long and annoying process.  Instead of just sending everything at once, the state sends little parts of paperwork along the way.  By the time my doctor got the most important piece of documents, there was little time to get it sent back in to the state.  After it was sent in, the next day I received notice that it was turned in...

Well... I am officially moved into my parents home.  It was such a blessing to have so many people come out and help.  Not only did I feel loved, but it reminded me that people still care.  Some  days get pretty lonely.  Your day is so filled with pain and tiredness that all you can do is stay in bed.  So naturally you loose contact with the world outside.  That has been a hard thing for me lately.  Slowly I have been able to witness my independence disappear from me.   Social activities are very few as it is hard to find the energy to even get to the place needed.  Naturally one misses out on things when you are absent from other events.   However, it is not just the social activities that are becoming few.  It is my ability to do things for myself.  I have talked about the dizziness before.  The other day, I met with a specialist regarding the ear. As per usual that required more blood work.  We talked about ...